My Pop Grades...

Now, since I've been questioned extensively as an expert on drinking pop (lest we forget the famous day when I consumed 35 cans) I thought I would give you all some advice on what kinds of pops I enjoy. Enjoy!

COLAS

1. Diet Pepsi - Better than Diet Coke. I can't say why, it just is. There...I said it (Don't you dare sue me Spade! I served you a hamburger damn it!).
2. Diet Coke - A very good choice, when Diet Pepsi is unavailable, which is in most restaraunts.
3. Coke Zero - Uses the original recipe for Coca-cola. Woooooo...I'm getting shivers! Or not. It's okay, but drink more than 3 in a row and your mouth tastes like Ellen DeGeneres looks.
4. Diet Super Chill - Ahhh...the Cub brand cola. Excellent. Or not terrible. At least it's not Tab.
5. Tab - Speaking of...

NON-COLAS

1. Diet Mountain Dew - Delicious. Delicious. Delicious. Also, the best pop for chugging, you know...if you get into a pop chugging contest (I'm looking at you on this one Dvorak!)
2. Diet Mountain Mist - Yep...this is the Cub brand. It's surprisingly good. And at lest it's not as gross as Vault Zero.
3. Vault Zero - Speaking of...
4. Sierra Mist Free/Sprite Zero - Both of these suck. Seriously. The only redeeming quality is they don't have caffeine. Bleh! Which is why they're last.
5. (Fresca is not on the list, as I don't believe in it. It's like Unicorns or chiropractors. It doesn't exist.)

*sidenote* I have neglected to include Mello-Yello and Surge, since they are not made anymore. But Surge was delicious and I drank two cans before every baseball game my senior year of high school. Which, I'm assuming is why I led the league in homers. That, and our fence was shorter than the fence at Williamsport. It's also the reason I got fat. That...and because I could eat 18 pieces of Godfather's pizza at the buffet. But I'm getting off track here. My point, I think, is that I hate the TV show "The Wedding Bells." It sucks horrible. *end sidenote*

CHERRY COLAS

1. Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi - Fantastic. Bold tase. Gives you wings. Or something more clever than that. No matter what anyone tells you it does not make you hallucinate.
2. Cherry Coke Zero - It's good. Just not great. But better than any of the colas, and all the Non-Colas besides Mountain Dew.
3. Diet Cherry Coke - It leaves a weird taste. Not bad. Just weird. Like Buddy Lembeck (come on Charles in Charge fans...get the joke!!)

PEPPER COLAS

1. Pibb Free - Score one for the Coke company! This is a delicious, refreshing beverage. Though I hate the name change (like how the Mars company got rid of Mars bars and replaced it with Snickers Almond.). What kind of game are they trying to pull here?
2. Diet Dr. Pepper - It's good, until you try Pibb Free. But at least it's not Diet Dr. Thunder.
3. Diet Dr. Thunder - Speaking of...