Johnny Bestface - Episode 1 - The Diner

Theme Song [sung by a midget in a panda costume, wearing a top hat, riding a hedgehog]

He's Joooohhhnnny, yep he's Johhhnnny, that's Johnny Bestface
He's the best, best, best
Better than the rest, rest, rest
The tests, tests, tests, he always passed, passed, passed
3rd base on a 1st date, he moves fast, fast, fast
His life kicks ass, ass, ass
That's why he's Joooohhhnnny, that's Johnny Bestface

[Deep Announcer Voice] On tonight's episode, Johnny goes to a diner with his pal CurleyWang...and hilarity ensues...let's watch...

{Scene: The inside of a greasy coffee shop, where the only two patrons are Johnny Bestface and Curley Wang. They're sitting at a booth in the corner}

Johnny: Dag! Seriously, that Portabella Mushroom tasted just like a steak! My toes are literally curling right now. Feel these nipples (opens his shirt for Curley to feel his nipples)
Curley: You're a nipple.
Johnny: (bows his head in disgust and sighs) I'm a nipple? What? That doesn't even make sense. (looks at the imaginary crowd to his right while chicken winging them) Did you hear that? I don't even know what to do with that! That rickwangulas!
Curley: (sits in stunned silence)
Johnny: See, that's the difference between us Curley. I know when to make a nonsensical joke and you don't. That's why I'm the best!

Theme Song starts playing again and the credits roll...

*If you were at all entertained by this little skit...I'm speechless*