So, I'm at work, sitting in my cube, trying to differentiate between EW and JD, when all the drinking makes me realize I need to facilitate. Never one to hold it for the sake of holding it, I decided to get off my duff and head to the head.
Now, as I've mentioned before, we have two urinals in the bathroom at work. What I haven't mentioned is that they have a half partition. So, from about the chest to mid-thigh, there is a divider between the urinals, so you don't "accidently sneak a peek" (I'm talking to you on that one Norris). This is all well and good, unless you are there by someone who is a wide-peer.
When I got to the bathroom, one of the urinals was already in use. And it was this one guy. I forget his name, something like Stumpy the Wide Legged Pee Guy, or General Five Foot Leg Span. Whatever.
The point is, the divider offers no protection for you when you're next to him. His legs go under the divider and are about halfway across the other urinal. So, to go to the bathroom, you have to sidle in like you're trying to make room at the Metrodome and pretend that this is a non-issue.
Some day, I'm just going to stand where I normally stand and end up peeing on his leg. I will, colsarnit, I promise I will. So, Henry, or General or whatever your name is, better watch your leg next week, because this has to stop.
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All these posts on peeing. I could tell you stories, boy. At present, I am teaching a three year old boy the mechanics of this process. Apparently, there are subtleties I have no chance of imparting.
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