Terrible benefit...

So, Alison's cousin is graduating from high school. And, in the grand tradition of most high schoolers, she is having a graduation party.

She went to the printers with her announcement about 2 months ago. They had some mix-up at the printer and, long story short, she didn't get the final announcements until yesterday.

And the party is next weekend. Soooo...she has to send them out at the waaay last minute and hope people are available to come.

And you know the printer gave her because they were so late? 150 more invitations. 150 more invitations?!?

Seriously? That's what you're giving for messing up? What in the world is she going to do with 150 extra invitations? Do you think she under-ordered, so these will come in handy? You know what would have come in handier than 150 extra invitations?

ANYTHING! Anything would have been better than that.

This is almost like blowing out a tire on a long road trip, getting towed to the shop and them telling you that they don't have any tires that will fit your car, but you can help yourself to some pork chops.

Verrry helpful.

18 Again...

Screw all this new noise about 17 Again (Mathew Perry...you might be a genius on Friends, but you suck an A in the theatre), I was at Target a bit ago and came upon a find that reminded me of the movie 18 Again! (and no, I didn't bring this up just to mention the rare topless-shot-in-a-PG-movie that 18 Again is known for):

Yep...thanks Target, for reminding us that people start as babies with little socks, then grow up and get bigger socks when they're kids, and then they need smaller socks again as they're an adult...it's the cycle of life...

Where's freakin' Zoltar when you need him?

Hey Sideburns Lady...

aka "Hasn't this poor girl had enough?"

Nope, sorry Rihanna...art wins out again. Hoo-rah!

Moving Prank: The Failure

This is the final part of an ongoing series about The Moving Prank:

The Failure

Well, we have a resolution to the moving prank...and it's backfired on us.

The intended victim caught up on my blog this weekend and had never seen the box. He showed his wife my blog to see if she knew what I was talking about.

And she did...EXCEPT...

She thought the stuff belonged to their old roommate (because he had an XBox) and she threw it away.

In hindsight, maybe we should have just put the football and the picture of Bea Arthur in there. Eh...live and learn.

Moving Prank: The Resolution...

This is Part 5 of an ongoing series about The Moving Prank:

The Resolution

Alas, all the build up has been for naught. As I type this, I'm crying like a baby in a forest fire (or Brent in a forest fire for that matter) because we have not gotten any results yet!

It's been almost two weeks and the box has yet to be found. If we are to believe the hider, the box is just sitting in the master bedroom closet, waiting to be discovered. Perhaps it got pushed under something.

Or perhaps the real reason it hasn't been found is because...these people are taking forever to unpack!

They're too busy riding around on their brand new zero turn lawnmower to put away some boxes and finish off the joke.

Dang it.

I'll have a part 2 of this if it's ever discovered.

Overall, I give this prank a 2.

Moving Prank: The Execution...

This is Part 4 of an ongoing series about The Moving Prank:

The Execution

Now, when we got there, there pretty much was only furniture to move. So, I left the box in my trunk and decided to wait for the opportunity.

That opportunity came rather quickly. While the prankee was dismantling a bed, I ran to the car, got the box and tossed it in the U-Haul...pretty much threw it like a football, so I wouldn't get caught.

So, the first phase of the plan was complete. However, we needed to get it out of the truck when we got there and into the house undetected.

Which, again, proved to be pretty easy. When we got there, I got the prankee to help me carry a piece of furniture that was going around the house to the basement. While carrying it, I told my cohorts to grab the box and get it in the house.

And they grabbed it and put it in the bedroom. Prank complete.

Hold on to your shorts, because we'll have the "exciting" conclusion tomorrow...

Moving Prank: The Plan...

This is Part 3 of an ongoing series about The Moving Prank:

The Plan

Now, the issue with this prank is that all the boxes had already been moved and all we were going to do was be loading furniture. So, we had to figure out a way to get it on the U-Haul undetected.

So, I loaded up the box, wrote "Bedroom" on it and tossed it in the trunk. Drove on over to the moving site and would try to decide for the perfect time to throw it in the U-Haul, where no one who wasn't in on the plan could see.

Ideally, we wanted to get there early, distract the victim and toss it in the truck first. That would have been about the best way.

We'll see how the actual execution went tomorrow.

Moving Prank: The Goods...

This is Part 2 of an ongoing series about The Moving Prank:

The Goods

Now, to make this prank as good as possible (which, let's face it, it's not that great to begin with, but it's something), you need to have stuff in there that could possibly belong to the person who you're playing this on. But, you also want some weird stuff. So, when the wife opens in, she'll go, "Hmmm...I wonder whose this is. Why is there a naked picture of Bea Arthur? In a frame? But there's also an old football. I guess this is Joe's stuff. Still strange he has that picture of Bea Arthur. Maybe I don't know him as well as I thought I did."

So, here is a picture and description of everything going in the box:

1) Old X-Box games

2) Old plastic gag banana

3) Creepy playing cards

4) Old version of H&R Block Tax Cut that they send you for free

5) Can of Oust

6) Empty tin of Cub-brand Honey Roasted Cashews

7) Printer cartridge (still in box)

8) Old, deflated football

9) Framed naked picture of Bea Arthur (outstanding)

Moving Prank: The Plot...

This is Part 1 of an ongoing series about The Moving Prank:

The Plot

So, Vance conceived an ingenious plan for when someone asks you to help them move. What you do is, take an old box from your house, put a bunch of your old and/or weird stuff in it, seal it, label it "Bedroom" (since everyone has a bedroom) and bring it along when you go to help them move.

Then, while in the midst of helping them move their boxes and furniture, you slip your box in there with theirs.

Good times ensue.

Count much?

So, I was at Target and there's a woman who is a TERRIBLE cashierist. Didn't realize I was in her line until too late. Not only did she take longer than any other line (which was shortest when I got there), she also charged me for two bags of cat food (the ONLY item I had was 1 bag of cat food...HOW in the WORLD can you miscount on 1 bag? Seriously?!?) and then couldn't figure out how to give me a refund, since she'd already charged my card. She needed to have a manager come over...

Good times in the land of Target...