Open Letter to KA

Brother Holzhauser -

I must say, it certainly been a long time! From what I hear, you're still living in the house! Let the good times roll, right? Amen to that! Hail Satan! The attic is still the pliz-ace to biz-ee. Feel?

But reminiscing about the past isn't exactly what this letter is meant to accomplish (though we should spill some Crown Royale for the past. Can I get a HOLLER?). I've been intrigued by all of the correspondence I've been receiving regarding alumni relations with THE Kappa Alpha Order. I just feel that I haven't been as much a part of "the scene" as I should be!

Since I am currently living in Minnesota, it makes it hard for me to make it back to hang out and watch our mighty Redhawks take on the fearsome rivals that are Bowling Green. It's also difficult to come and participate in Hold'em Tournaments. But that doesn't mean I don't want to help.

Unfortunately, I am unable to make a monetary donation. Due to some bad advice from my financial planner, I worked out a contract that pays me in super bounce balls instead of US currency. I now see the folly of my ways, and would be happy to share my insights with any of the current members of THE Order.

I was also thinking of starting a THE Kappa Alpha Order - Epsilon Llambda - TC Alumni division. For all the members of THE Order of Miami who have moved to the Twin Cities. Though this might just be me, I will have the meetings on a thrice-monthly basis in my parents basement...aka where I live. I will be sure to forward you the minutes and send for approval any initiatives we pass.

You're more than welcome to attend any meeting you want. They will be held on the first three Mondays of the month, at 8 o'clock, during the commercial breaks of Prison Break. My mom will provide us with juice boxes (none of that Capri-Sun shit) and homemade Kosher Rice Krispie bars.

It's because of you that we've kept everyone in touch and I just want to help continue on with the tradition...and good workings...of THE Order.

Fraternally,

Brother Nelson aka The Don