Apprentice I...

What is the deal with yelling “Unbelievable!”? How did Danny get everyone to do that so quickly? Did he put something in the water? Is he the new Jim Jones? Seriously, after 15 minutes with these people, he has them singing along with his folk guitar and yelling inane catch-phrases while trying to formulate a business plan? He must have the leadership skills of God! Would you have followed along if you had been there? Do you think they would have beaten you up if you had not followed along? You know, kind of like in prison, when one of the white supremacist doesn’t want to be in the white power race anymore, everyone else has the beat him up. I think that’s how the Magna Corp. is: Blood In, Blood Out.

How did Danny come up with that marketing scheme? Seriously, I want to know. What the hell was going on? OK, so the theme is baseball. That I get. I consider myself to be a reasonably intelligent person, but what did throwing the golf ball underhanded from five feet away into a hole in the homeless man's house have to do with baseball? And what really was the promotion? What did you win? I’m willing to bet you didn’t win anything. Here’s the sequence of events that probably happened but NBC didn't want to show it...
Danny: Hey, we have this huge promotion going! I wear stupid clothes. I'm annoying and look like a tool. You wanna try this game?
Un-amused Patron: No
Danny: Come on. It’s really fun! (Strumming on guitar while singing to the American Pie chords) Fun, fun, yes we’re getting’ it done. Eating at Burger King while we’re having some fun…
Un-amused Patron: God, would it get you to shut your stupid cake hole?
Danny: You know it would.
Un-amused Patron: Fine then. What do I do?
Danny: OK, now we've never met before, correct sir?
Un-amused Patron: I hate you with every fiber of my being.
Danny: Uh...ok. On to the game then. Just stand over here and throw the ball through that hole!
Un-amused Patron: (stands at the line and sinks the ball in the hole. Looks at Danny, waiting for a prize)
Danny: Great shot! OK, who’s next?
Un-amused Patron: Don’t I get a prize for making that?
Danny: You had the pleasure of participating! That should be prize enough, but I guess you can sing along with me.
Un-amused Patron: (shakes his head in disgust as he walks away)
George: That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. And that game is pretty dumb too.

I’d like to congratulate Billy Bob for making Donald Trump feel uncomfortable at the 21 club. I would bet that’s about the hardest thing in the world to do. This is a man who wears pink ties into boardrooms and it appears he has some kind of dead ferret on his head, but he never looks like he’s uncomfortable. Until you start dropping f-bombs on him in an exclusive restaurant. You might want to look up classy in the dictionary. Might learn a thing or two.

I like how the Net Worth leader (who looks like a pudgier Vince Vaughn in Swingers) tried to bond with all of the Burger King workers by saying that none of the "managers" went to college either. Do you think the workers really cared? Because at the end of the day, the people on the show are going back to the Penthouse and the Burger King workers are going back to a one bedroom loft they share with four generations of their family while trying to make sure that everyone has enough cereal and water to eat. So, I’m sure there was a real kinship there. Well played Fat Vince Vaughn.

I’d like to admonish the Donald for presenting America with a very misleading fact. OK, so everyone on the high school side is worth, on average, three times more than the college side. These are all reasonably young people. So, in theory, most of the college people graduated in the last year or two. So, they have loans and have just started making their way in the business world. The high school people have at least 6 years of making money on all the college people. Are you surprised they’re worth more? That’s like saying Todd Van Poppel is a better pitcher than Mark Prior, because when Van Poppel was 22, he was in the majors but Prior had just graduated college and was in single A baseball. Let’s see where everyone is in a few more yours. You’re on a very slippery slope with this one Trump. Be careful.

My Prediction for the Winner after week 1: Kendra