Apprentice IV

Did anyone else see the size of the hoops on Audrey’s earrings in the beginning? I think we all know what that means! I’m just sayin’…

Words I was praying to God I would hear soon “Let’s make this vegetable porno the best vegetable porno we can possibly make, with a gay twist.” Thank you Michael, for making one man’s dream into a reality. Ahhh…good, clean, fun, gay-related humor.

“I do everything myself because I know when I do things myself, they turn out a lot better.” Hmmm…inflated ego…check. Overbearing sense of self-worth…check. Words that you’re going to come back and regret saying…check.

I think a special shout needs to go out to the actress who bitched out Cher. Seriously. Way to try to extend your 15 minutes of fame by ripping on the people who picked you to be on the commercial. Do you think her “agent” had her doe this? And by agent, I of course mean the man who hangs out by the 7/11 with no pants on, yelling obscenities at the pigeons. I think her career arc is about at the peak right now.

Not happy…population: Audrey. Smoking hot…population: Audrey. Nothing like a pissed off hot girl to drive ratings. I’m going to own this fact. I like Audrey more and more each time she opens her mouth. She’s blunt, like a kitchen knife. Spicy.

“You both sucked.” Nice. You gotta like that. At least he didn’t pick one of the teams to be the winner. “You both sucked, but in another, more accurate way, Magna sucked more”. They were both awful. I think we could have had third graders make a better commercial.

“Hi, my name’s Tana. Please attach a saddle to my back and ride me in a race. It’s what I am bred to do.”

Just because you multi-task and do a whole bunch of things crappy, doesn’t mean you should bring up how good you are at multi-tasking. I can juggle knives while walking and chewing gum, just not very well.

Audrey kicked so many asses in the boardroom. That was awesome. She was like Will Clark in there. The strong silent type, until you need to make the point, and then you start ripping it up and keeping everyone in line. Fantastic.

My prediction for a winner after week 4: Still Kendra. I am officially on the Audrey bandwagon though and I would like to subscribe to her newsletter.